At the moment I noticed this, I had an important decision to make- say something or shut it. I, of course, chose incorrectly.
Me: "Hey Code- I think there's something wrong with your mouth."
Cody: "What?"
Me: "It's sort of droopy on one side. Does it feel funny?"
Cody [poking at his face]: "No....."
He got up and went to the nearest mirror to investigate. Upon seeing the problem (which wasn't egregious, but definitely noticeable) I sensed he may have been slipping into a carefully controlled panic.
Cody: "What would cause that?"
Me [jokingly]: "Probably just a minor stroke."
Carefully controlled panic over. Full blown hysteria commencing........
Cody: "Does a stroke do that?"
Me: "Well, sometimes if someone has a stroke, one side of their body will droop or lose feeling. But I was just kidding. You didn't have a stroke."
Cody: "What if I did?"
Me: "You didn't."
Cody: "What if I did?"
Me: "You didn't."
Cody: "How do you know?"
Me: [sigh] "Because I just know. I've had clients who had strokes. You didn't have a stroke. I was just teasing. You're fine."
Cody: "Well how would we know if I did?"
Me: "Are you having difficulty swallowing your coffee?"
Cody: "No."
Me: "Are you having difficulty talking or saying words?"
Cody: "No."
Me: "Is your vision blurred in one eye?"
Cody: "No."
Me: "Do you feel weak on one side of your body?"
Cody: "No."
Me: "You didn't have a stroke."
Cody: "What if I did?"
Me: "You didn't."
Cody: "Well what is it then?"
Me: "I don't know, Cody. Maybe your lip is swollen or something."
Cody spent the rest of the morning poking at his face, moving his mouth around, and running to the mirror to see if it had gone away. Periodically he asked "Could I have had a stroke?" and "What if I did have a stroke?" and "What would it be if it wasn't a stroke?" I suggested perhaps he had Bell's Palsy because clearly I hadn't learned my lesson from suggesting a stroke and should have known that strokes aren't funny and I didn't really think it was Bell's Palsy either. Now he was worried about a stroke AND Bell's Palsy and he didn't even know what Bell's Palsy WAS.
All throughout that morning, he continued to check back with me, just in case I had changed my mind about his possible Transient Ischemic Attack. At one point, he asked me how I would assess whether a client had a stroke, so I agreed to administer a mini mental status exam. This was more to calm him down than to actually determine his cognitive state, but it seemed like a reasonable idea.
Me: "Do you know what day it is?"
Cody: "Saturday."
Me: "What is the date?"
Cody: "Uh....25th. NO!! Is it? Did I have a stroke? I don't know the date."
Me: "Calm down. Lots of people don't know the date. I don't know the date half the time. It's fine."
Cody: "Wait! It's the 26th! Boo-ya!"
Me: "Yeah I guess it is......Do you know what city we're in?"
Cody: "Boise"
Me: "Repeat after me- 'no ifs ands or buts'."
After he had repeated this, spelled "WORLD" backwards, counted backward from 100 by 7's (which I always thought was a mean question to ask people because I can only do that if I have a calculator and I don't even have dementia) and answered a half dozen more questions about who the president is and whether he could remember some things I'd said earlier, I pronounced him stroke free. This alleviated his concerns for at least five seconds.......
All day long, he asked me for status updates as to whether I thought his face had returned to normal. Eventually it did. He remains perplexed by the mouth drooping incident, so if any of you have a suggestion as to what may have caused it, I'd love to know what it is so I will be prepared for future occurrences.
I should know better than to react to these types of things. Once, a year or so ago, we were leaving his parent's house after eating dinner there and on our way to the car, in the glow of the garage lights, I noticed he looked a little unusual.
These days, I'm more familiar with Cody's tendency to be a worrier. If it had happened NOW, I would probably have just noted it quietly to myself and waited for it to go away or for him to notice on his own. But this was earlier on in our relationship and I wasn't as knowledgeable. In hindsight, I may have reacted a bit poorly.
Of course, once he saw his pupils, he was certain he must be only a few short moments from death. Realizing I might possibly have overreacted, I tried to smooth things over, but I had already dropped the proverbial turd in the punch bowl.
When his parents could offer no rational explanation, I drove us home, in case he had a seizure or a demonic possession while driving. On the way, I called my sister and asked her to pull up WebMD on her computer and help us figure out why he had zombie pupils. When there was no solace from the online world, we resorted to calling the "Ask A Nurse" line. In his panicked state, he had forgotten that a few minutes before, he had put eye drops in one of his eyes because that eye felt dry. Apparently eye drops can dilate your pupils. So clearly Visine does more than just get the red out and I think they should add something to their slogan about their product's potential to cause demon-spawn pupil dilation.
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